Monday, September 26, 2005

"Hogwarps"?

I’ve begun to piece together a pretty interesting little story in my mind. I’m not generally a good writer of stories. I can give you a flowery sentence. I can make Lisa fall in love with me in an email. I can make mom cry or Esther laugh in a blog post. But when it comes to plot or dialogue or beginning, middle, end and all that, I tend to revert to high school composition class. Or worse yet, internet fanboy.

Funny tangent – I decided I wanted a book to carry with me for those minutes between classes when I don’t have time to study, so I (illegally) downloaded a copy of the most recent Harry Potter book and transferred it to my ipaq. And man, it sucked. I was so surprised that Rowling could a) lose any and all writing talent and b) destroy the characters/plots/settings that she’d worked so hard to create. Halfway through the book, Dumbledore had become a bad guy, Ron and Hermione were dead, and Harry could turn into a hippogriff. Now, I don’t want to give anything away, but even those of you who haven’t yet read the first half of the real Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince should be calling shenanigans when Harry turns into a hippogriff. That’s right: I’d downloaded fan-lit. An 800 page pile of geek-written, steaming poop. Who’s the bigger geek, though? The geek who writes their own Potter book, or the geek who reads 400 pages of it?

Anyway, even though I’m not really the Hemmingway that Lisa makes me out to be (although I do like my night hours) I‘m starting to like the story that’s been simmering in my brain the last few weeks. I might share some ideas (or even snippits) as they present themselves to me, but that’d take a lot of effort, so don’t expect anything soon. Then again, I do have a lot of time on my hands, now that I’m no longer reading Phony Faker and the Fake-Blood Fraud.

4 comments:

lisa said...

your e-mails (among other things) did make me fall in love with you. and the fact that i just noticed a timer counting down to your birthday is making me question it.

Scott said...

How you uh, how you comin' on that novel you're working on? Huh? Gotta a big, uh, big stack of papers there? Gotta, gotta nice litte story you're working on there? Your big novel you've been working on for 3 years? Huh? Gotta, gotta compelling protaganist? Yeah? Gotta obstacle for him to overcome? Huh? Gotta story brewing there? Working on, working on that for quite some time? Huh? Yea, talking about that 3 years ago. Been working on that the whole time? Nice little narrative? Beginning, middle, and end? Some friends become enemies, some enemies become friends? At the end your main character is richer from the experience? Yeah? Yeah?

Scott said...

Oh I know it hurts now, but look at the bright side: you have some new material for that novel you've been writing. You know...the novel you've been workin' on? You know the the one, uh, you've been workin on for three years? You know the novel. Got somethin' new to write about now. You know? Maybe a, maybe a main character gets into a relationship and suffers a little heartbreak? Somethin' like what... what you've just been through? Draw from real life experience? Little, little heartbreak? You know? Work it into the story? Make the characters a little more three dimensional? Little, uh, richer experience for the reader? Make those second hundred pages really keep the reader guessing what's going to happen? Some twists and turns? A little epilogue? Everybody learns that the hero's journey isn't always a happy one? Oh, I look forward to reading it.

Garvey said...

Yeah, I wondered if someone was going to pick up on "beginning, middle, end and all that".

"No, no, you deseeeerve some time off..."