Monday, March 13, 2006

Niagara on the Lake

Editor’s note: I wrote this on Sunday. Yeah I’m late. I’m on vacation. Shut up.

It’s been awhile since I posted from my iPaq, but let’s make up for that today. Right now, I’m sitting in Niagara on the Lake at Shaw’s Coffee and Wine Bar (many famous writers, evidently, have their own restaurants - this one’s nice, but stay away from Agatha Christie’s BBQ Pit). Lisa’s off cashing in the massage gift certificate I got her for Christmas. I opted to hole up here with a cup of coffee, a sandwich (“I’ll have a vente ‘Man and Super-Mud’, and a ‘Pig-malion’ on whole wheat, please…”) and a book, but since I forgot my book, I’ll tap out a blog post instead.

The trip has been great, so far. We got in yesterday, walked, ate, drank, and window-shopped. Here’s the bullet point run down:

  • If Niagara on the Lake was an anime creature, Lisa surmises, it would be called “Niagaramon the Lak”.

  • Dinner last night at the Prince of Wales was sea bass and tenderloin and garlic knots and gnocchi and risotto and awesome.

  • I bought a bottle of Niagara region ice wine to give to my friend (and dentist) who introduced me to the stuff years ago. Knowing nothing about wine at all, we just bought the one in the coolest packaging.

  • They love their Scottish/Irish stuff here.

  • The first time I came to N.o.t.L., I was in middle school, and I remember lunch at a pub called Fournas because it had a condom vending machine in the bathroom. Couldn’t tell you what show I was here to see, but damned if I’m going to forget the first rubber dispenser I ever saw.

  • Lisa and I had lunch at Fournas yesterday. Ah, the memories.

  • We stayed at the Queen’s Landing last night - it was comfy and quiet and beautiful and the shower was so large, I hear it’s pushing for commonwealth status. The perfect setting in which to kick off the Laziest Spring Break Ever.

  • We rented Walk the Line, which really was excellent. You know how Seabisquit was just cut and pasted from Days of Thunder, with “horse” replacing every time the script said “car”? Jon Stewart was right: Walk the Line was Ray, with “pills” replacing “needle”.

Well, I’ve killed off an hour, here among the spirit of long dead playwrights, the smell of Canadian bacon sandwiches, and the sound of loonies dropping into the tip jar. Lisa should be done soon, and then it’s back to the States. Just enough time for a trip to the bathroom. Anyone need something from the “Armors for the Man” vending machine?

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