I’ve always had really good eyesight. Years of Nintendo strengthened these rods and cones into what is far and away my most powerful sense. (Disclaimer: I have no idea what rods and cones do.) (Heh-heh. “Rods” and “cones”.) But all that has been thrown into turmoil during the last few years of (blech) reading. So...
Your Mike Garvey is getting reading glasses.
I’d never really had an eye test before, aside from the government mandated nonsense they gave you back in grade school. (Government efficiency at its best can diagnose your eyesight, measure the curve of your spine, rule out foot warts, and verify that you still can’t do a single damn pull-up in the same 50 minute period.) But I’ve been getting slight headaches after long days in the library reading about the law or on the internet looking at porn I mean the law, so off to the eye doc I went.
All I knew about eye exams was that they’d at some point make me read a Bazooka Joe comic printed on a grain of rice from across the room and at some other point they’d blow a puff of air right on my eye spheres. Right on these rods and cones.
After all that, it turns out I’m pretty heavily farsighted. So I got a chuckle out of Bazooka Joe, but need reading glasses anyway. Here’s a pic of the ones I chose. A little too Lisa Loeb and not enough Clark Kent, but I’m excited about them regardless:
Your Mike Garvey is getting damned old.